06/30/25 Grif.Net – Still MORE Grandpa Jokes

[Might as well end June with more high-quality pu=
ns and word plays better than Dad ever told.]

 

I wonde=
red why the pupils are the last part of the body to stop working when you d=
ie.

Then I remembered they dil=
ate.

 

Teresa asked me the other day where I secretly s=
tore so much candy.

I said, =
"I always have a few Twix up my sleeve."

 

It=
seems that baseball umpires all appeared to be fat.

Then I recalled how much they liked to clean the pla=
te.

 

I asked my friend Sam to sing me a song honoring =
my iPhone.

He thought a minute=
and then Samsung.

 =

I have a contact lens problem.

Sadly, I don’t have contact=
lens solution.

 

NASA is starting a new mission to out=
er space to let aliens know we’re sorry for poluting space.

It’s call Apollo-G.

 

I was asked what pronouns does chocolate use?

Obviously Her/She.

 

In Amer=
ica, using the metric system can get you in legal trouble.

In fact, if you try to use any other method of=
measuring liquids, you may be held in contempt of quart.=

 

My buddy’s been working out and he asked the trainer what machin=
e he should use to attract the cute gals.

Trainer looked him over, then suggested the ATM.

 

~~

Dr Bob Griffin=

bo=
[email protected]  ww=
w.grif.net

&#822=
0;From all harm safe in His sheltering arms
I’=
m living by faith and feel no alarm.”