[Exclusive to the Grif Net reporters] At the fifth lar=
gest US airport, an individual (later discovered to be a teacher) was arres=
ted trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, =
an undisclosed number of sharp #2 pencils, a slide rule, and a calculator. =
At a morning press conference, the prosecution reported the man may be a me=
mber of the notorious al-Gebra movement. He is being charged by the F=
BI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
"Al-Gebra is a fearsome=
cult," he said. "They desire average solutions by means an=
d extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value.=
They use secret code names like "x" and "y" and =
refer to themselves as "unknowns", but we have determined they be=
long to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in ev=
ery country.
"As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to teach, ̶=
0;There are 3 sides to every triangle."
When asked to comment on the =
arrest later, the press secretary said, "If God had wanted us to have =
better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and=
toes.”
"I am gratified that our government has given us a sine =
that it is intent on protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to=
disintegrate us with calculus disregard. Murky statisticians love to=
inflict plane on every sphere of influence," he said, adding: "U=
nder the circumferences, we must differentiate their root, make our point, =
and draw the line."
The President read off the teleprompter: "Th=
ese weapons of math instruction have the potential to decimal everything in=
their math on a scalene never before seen unless we become exponents of a =
Higher Power and begin to factor-in random facts off vertex."
The Vic=
e President praised this response, saying, "As a great former Leader w=
ould say, ‘Read my ellipse’. Here is one principle I’m ce=
rtain of: though they continue to multiply, their days are numbered as the =
hypotenuse tightens around their necks.”
~~
Dr Bob Griffin
[email protected] www.grif.net
"Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!"
www.avast.com