Reviewing footage of actual police cam videos around the country came =
up with these great lines from the men and women in =
** "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll =
stretch after you wear them a while."
** "If you take your hands off the car, I’ll make your birth =
certificate a worthless document."
** "If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired." =
** "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that’s =
the speed of the bullet that’ll be chasing you." =
** "You don’t know how fast you were going? I guess that means I =
can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?" =
** "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don’t =
think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I’m the shift =
** "Warning! You want a warning? O. K., I’m warning you not to do =
that again or I’ll give you another ticket." =
** "The answer to this final question will determine whether you =
are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?" =
** "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where =
you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and corn dogs and step in =
monkey poo. "
** "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a =
** "How big were those ‘Just two =
beers’ you say you had?"
** "I’m glad to hear that the Police Chief is a personal friend =
of yours. Good you know someone who can post your =
** "You didn’t think we give pretty women tickets? You’re right, =
we don’t. Sign here."
Dr Bob Griffin =
Knows Me, This I Love!"