Grif.Net

More choices for the best (or wurst) puns, this the December batch: “She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.” or “A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.” ~~ Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net “Jesus knows me, this…

Obama

The year is 1908. One hundred years ago. Here are some statistics for the Year 1908: The average life expectancy was 47 years. The tallest structure in the world was the Eiffel Tower! Only 14% of the homes had a bathtub. Only 8% of the homes had a telephone. There…

[I was asked what I was thankful for in 2008. I thought about my wife

A youngster was playing in the living room while Dad was watching the news. The newscaster added a brief word at the conclusion of a story. “And two Brazilian men died in a skydiving accident.” The child took that in and tears began to form in her eyes. “That’s horrible!!…

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez. “How was he killed?” asked one detective. “With a golf gun,” the other detective replied. “A golf gun? What is a golf gun?” “I don’t know. But it sure made a hole in Juan.” ~~ Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net “Jesus…

Dan wrote that a man charged into a bank wearing a bandana and wielding a handgun. He shouted, “This is a stick-up; everyone, get on the floor!” He then proceeded to empty the cash drawers. As he ran toward the door with the loot, a brave customer yanked off the…

[From a 3rd Grade teacher] The most eye-opening civics lesson I ever had was while teaching third grade in 2008. The presidential election was heating up and some of the children showed an interest. I decided we would have an election for a class president. We would choose our nominees.…

[The Grif.Net has been off line as our computer was infested by demons named RAM, DOS, ROM, ACSII and a host of other malware evils. It is back, kinda and we have purchased a new Toshiba and will be shifting files, backing up stuff over the next week. I assume…

“Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,” the divorce Court Judge said, “And I’ve decided to give your wife $775 a week,” “That’s very fair, your honor,” the husband said. “And every now and then I’ll try to send her a few bucks myself” ~~ Dr Bob Griffin,…

[I used this story on Sunday to illustrate the nature of the human condition] Little Carol came into the kitchen where her mother was making dinner. Her birthday was coming up and she thought this was a good time to tell her mother what she wanted. ‘Mom, I want a…

In honor of our Veteran’s on this special day, a little odd advice – Friendly fire – isn’t. Recoilless rifles – aren’t. Suppressive fire – won’t. You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note. A sucking chest wound is Nature’s way of telling you to slow down. If…

During a visit to the Mental Asylum, a visitor asked the Director, ‘How do you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized?’ ‘Well,’ said the Director, ‘we fill up a bathtub, and then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him…