[Here we are in Wisconsin, beautiful fall colors, rolling hills and Norman
Rockwell paintings come to life. And we promised yesterday when we teased
the ladies that we’d give a few ways for the men here to know “You are a
Farmer if . . .
If your dog rides in your truck more than your wife:
If you call the implement dealer and he recognizes your voice:
If the vet’s number is on the speed dial of your phone:
If your second vehicle is still a pickup:
If your tan lines are somewhere below your shoulder and above your elbow:
If the best dinner out with the wife also included a talk by a seed corn
dealer:
If your mailbox looks like a piece of farm machinery:
If you have a yard, but not a lawn:
If you have lots of machinery and each piece is worth more than your house:
If the neighbor’s house is best viewed with binoculars:
If the directions to your house include the words, “miles,” “silos,” “last,”
or “gravel road”:
If the tractor and the combine have air conditioning and an FM radio, but
your car doesn’t:
If your storage shed is a barn:
If you measure travel in miles not minutes:
If your car’s color is two-toned and one color is gravel road brown:
If you shovel the sidewalk with a skid loader:
If quality time with your wife includes a flashlight in one hand and a
wrench in the other:
If your second job in town is considered a farm subsidy:
If you wear specific hats to farm sales, livestock auctions, customer
appreciation suppers, and vacations:
If you’ve never thrown away a 5-gallon bucket:
If you have used bailing wire ready to attach a license plate:
If you have driven off the road while examining your neighbor’s irrigation
system:
If you’ve borrowed gravel from the county road to fill potholes in your
driveway:
If you have buried a dog and cried like a baby:
~~
Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net
1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given