The Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational asked readers to take any word from
the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and
supply a new definition. Among the best were:
1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you
realize it was your money to start with.
2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject
financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
4. Bozone (n): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright
ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign
of breaking down in the near future.
5. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
6. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who
doesn’t get it.
7. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
8. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.
9. Karmageddon: It’s when everybody is sending off all these really bad
vibes, and then the Earth explodes, and it’s a serious bummer.
10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming
only things that are good for you
11. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they
come at you rapidly.
12. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your
bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
13. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the
apple you’re eating.
14. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net
“Jesus knows me, this I love”