Signs in the USA (reported to be true, and I partially believe it)
In front of a New Hampshire restaurant
“Now serving live lobsters”
On a New Jersey restaurant menu
“Blackened bluefish”
In a Maine restaurant
“Open seven days a week and weekends.”
On a long established New Mexico dry cleaning store
“Thirty-eight years on the same spot.”
In a New York drugstore
“We dispense with accuracy.”
In a New York medical building
“Mental Health Prevention Center”
In a Minnesota funeral parlor
“Ask about our layaway plan.”
In a clothing store in Green Bay
“Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks”
Outside a country shop in Illinois
“We buy junk and sell antiques.”
In a Tacoma, Washington men’s clothing store
“15 men’s wool suits – $100 – They won’t last an hour!”
In the vestry of a New England church
“Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is
extinguished”
A sign seen on a restroom dryer at O’Hare Field in Chicago
“Do not activate with wet hands.”
In a New Hampshire jewelry store
“Ears pierced while you wait.”
In a New York restaurant
“Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to see the manager.”
In a Florida maternity ward
“No children allowed.”
In the offices of a Texas loan company
“Ask about our plans for owning your home.”
At a number of US military bases
“Restricted to unauthorized personnel.”
On a display of ‘You are my one and only’ valentine cards at the Mall
“Now available in multi-packs of 10”
On a Tennessee highway
“Take notice: when this sign is under water, this road is impassable.”
In front of a New Hampshire car wash
“If you can’t read this, it’s time you wash your car.”
From the safety information card in America West Airline seat pocket
“If you are sitting in an exit row and can not read this card, please tell a
crew member.”
A sign on top of a San Francisco drug store located across the street from
the Transbay bus terminal
“Terminal Drugs”
~~
Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net
“Jesus knows me, this I love”