#10 ~ Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what’s that? #9 ~ Hand me that, uh, that uh, thingie. #8 ~ Ya know, there’s big money in kidneys. Hey, this guy’s got two of ’em! #7 ~ Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens! #6 ~…

#10 ~ Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what’s that? #9 ~ Hand me that, uh, that uh, thingie. #8 ~ Ya know, there’s big money in kidneys. Hey, this guy’s got two of ’em! #7 ~ Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens! #6 ~…

Are you tired of those sissy ‘friendship’ poems that always sound good but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of True Friendship. You WON’T see cutesy little smiley faces; just the stone cold truth of our great friendship. 1. When…

There were two rich brothers who looked great on the outside, even attending church regularly, but whose hearts were evil. A new, more astute pastor arrived at the church. The congregation grew and a fund raising campaign was started to add a new auditorium for the church. All of a…

The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the country preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased. “He was an honest man. He was a loving husband. He was a kind father. He was generous with all his friends. Blah, blah, blah.”…

HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED? You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. –Derrick, age 8 WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON? Both don’t want any more kids. –Lori, age 8…

[Thanks for the forward to Duane. Very appropriate illustration.] A sick man turned to his doctor as he was preparing to leave the examination room and said, ‘Doctor, I am afraid to die. Tell me what lies on the other side.’ Very quietly, the doctor said, ‘I don’t know.’ ‘You…

[I joked with a friend that I ushered in the New Year at 10 pm and he forwarded this description of a senior citizen] I am a senior citizen… – I’m the life of the party… even when it lasts ’till 8pm. – I’m very good at opening childproof caps…

Once upon a time in a far-away country, a king and queen lived happily in their kingdom. But one day, a giant pair of yellow fingers appeared in front of their castle. Anyone attempting to leave the castle had to pass through the yellow fingers which would snap shut and…

[A friend sent me this blessing. A smile crossed my lips when reading it.] May peace break into your home and may thieves come to steal your debts. May the pockets of your jeans become a magnet for $50 bills. May love stick to your face like Vaseline and may…

A man scolded his son for being so unruly and the child rebelled against his father. He got some of his clothes, his teddy bear and his piggy bank and proudly announced, ‘I’m running away from home!’ The father calmly decided to help the lad look at the matter logically.…

[From Deanna] 1. Under which calendar is New Year’s Day Jan. 1? A. Julian Calendar B. Gregorian Calendar C. Jewish Calendar D. Chinese Calendar E. All of the above 2. What calendar determines the date of the Chinese New Year? A. Lunar B. Solar C. Chinese D. Zen 3. Rosh…

LOVE: The Special Feeling that Makes You Feel All Warm and Wonderful. RESPECT: Treating Others as Well as You Would Like to be Treated. APPRECIATION: To Be Grateful for All the Good Things Life has to Offer. HAPPINESS: The Full Enjoyment of Each Moment. (A Smiling Face) FORGIVENESS: The Ability…