Many people may have missed learning in school =
about the famous American author James Fennimore Cooper and his book =
about the life of Santa Claus. I’m reading it again and finding =
out . . .
>Its title is ‘The Deer =
>Its cover is a rare photograph of Santa taken =
with a North Polaroid camera
the pages of the book, you’ll find out that Santa’s primary language is =
>You’ll learn that Santa and Mrs. Claus live in =
an icicle built for two and that he loves tending his three gardens and =
exulting, "Hoe, hoe, hoe!"
>You’ll also discover that St. Nicholas is the =
main Claus. His wife is a relative Claus. His children are dependent =
Clauses. Santa’s elves are subordinate Clauses
>Amazed to find out on Christmas Eve, Santa eats =
a jolly roll, leaps into his sleigh, and urges his toys to hop in the =
sack. Santa’s sleigh always comes out first because it starts in the =
Pole position. It also gets terrific mileage because it has =
long-distance runners on each side.
>Kris Kringle especially loves all his reindeer =
because every buck is deer to him.
>When traveling in the sleigh in inclement =
weather, Santa gets icicles in his beard and calls them chin chillas. =
>He sometimes removes all the jingle bells from =
his sleigh and travels silently through the night, hoping one day to win =
a No Bell prize.
>When flying to Cape Canaveral, radar tracking =
gives his sleigh a palindrome label – “A SANTA AT =
>Santa loves sliding down chimneys because it =
soots him. But he actually has a fear of getting stuck. That fear is =
called Santa Claustrophobia.
>Since Santa has to go up and down a wide =
variety of chimneys on Christmas, he recommends getting a yearly flue =
More information to come as I continue reading the =
book. Now, where are my glasses . . .
Dr Bob Griffin =
firstname.lastname@example.org www.grif.net =
"Jesus Knows Me, This I =