“Hello, this is Ethyl. =
Now you say something."
"Hi. John’s answering =
machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak slowly, and =
I’ll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets. =
"Hi. This is Steve. If you =
are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, =
please send money. If you are my bank loan officer, you didn’t lend me =
enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are =
female, don’t worry, I have plenty of money." =
"Hi. I am probably home. =
I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I =
don’t call back, it’s you."
"If you are a burglar, =
then we’re probably at home cleaning our weapons right now and can’t =
come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren’t home and it’s safe to =
leave us a message."
Dr Bob Griffin =
firstname.lastname@example.org www.grif.net =
"Jesus Knows Me, This I =