ONLY IN AMERICA (By Russian Comedian Yakov Schmirnoff)
Only in America…can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in America…are there handicap parking places in front of a skating
rink.
Only in America…do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry — and
a diet coke.
Only in America…do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to
the counters.
Only in America…do we leave cars worth $30,000 in the driveway and leave
useless things and junk in boxes in the garage.
Only in America…do we use answering machines to screen calls and
then have call waiting so we won’t miss a call from someone we didn’t
want to talk to in the first place.
Only in America…do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages of eight.
Only in America…do we use the word ‘politics’ to describe the
process so well. ‘Poli’ in Latin means MANY and ‘tics’ means BLOOD SUCKING
CREATURES.
~~ANSWERS TO NORTH AMERICA’S MOST POPULATED ISLANDS
1. Long Island, New York (7,700,000)
2. Island of Montreal, Quebec (1,850,000)
3. Manhattan Island, New York (1,650,000)
4. Oahu, Hawaii (950,00)
5. Vancouver, British Columbia (750,000)
6. Newfoundland, Newfoundland and Labrador (500,000)
7. Staten Island, New York (470,000)
8. Île Jésus, Quebec (410,000)
9. Hawaii, Hawaii (175,000)
10. Lulu Island, British Columbia (168,000)
Cuba and Puerto Rico are considered part of the Caribbean Islands and NOT
part of North America. That is geographic distinction that I think is
ludicrous
~~
Dr Bob Griffin
[email protected] www.grif.net
“Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!”