02/20/14 Grif.Net – Top 10 Signs your Church has Sold Out

02/20/14 Grif.Net – Top 10 Signs your Church has Sold Out

[Does your church get extra income from new corporate sponsors? Hmmm.]

10. Nike “swoosh” on the cross
9. Communion cups have Welch’s Grape Juice logo
8. Bulletin has coupon section for after-church dinner specials
7. In Christmas play, Joseph seen with a hair done by Vidal Sassoon
6. Greeters all dressed like Mr. Goodwrench
5. Selling personalized licenses for luxury pews with wet bar/satellite TV
4. Baptismals include dolphin show from Sea World
3. Picture of Jesus on Palm Sunday has Him riding a Clydesdale
2. Holy water looks suspiciously like Diet Pepsi
1. The 12 disciples replaced by Disney characters

ANSWERS to MORE Mind-Bending Number Quiz (Remember, each contains the
initials of words + numbers of well-known phrases. You must uncover the
meaning of the clues.)

Example: 13 S on the A F = 13 STRIPES on the AMERICAN FLAG

1. 24 H in a D = 24 HOURS in a DAY
2. 40 D and N of the G F = 40 DAYS and NIGHTS of the GREAT FLOOD
3. 29 D in F (if a L Y) = 29 DAYS in FEBRUARY (if a LEAP YEAR)
4. 1000 W that a P is W = 1000 WORDS that a PICTURE is WORTH
5. 11 P on a F T = 11 PLAYERS on a FOOTBALL TEAM
6. 5 D in a Z C = 5 DIGITS in a ZIP CODE
7. 1 W on a U = 1 WHEEL on a UNICYCLE
8. 8 S on a S S = 8 SIDES on a STOP SIGN
9. 32 D at which W F = 32 DEGREES at which WATER FREEZES
10. 54 C in a D (with the J) = 54 CARDS in a DECK (with the JOKERS)


Dr Bob Griffin
“Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!”