A dog not only has a fur coat but also pants.
No man goes before his time — unless the boss leaves early.
A bill collector came to my house the other day, so I gave him a nice big
stack of old bills.
I love how we don’t even need to say out loud that I’m your favorite child.
If you practice moderation in *everything*, isn’t that immoderate?
Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven’t fallen
There are 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and
those who don’t get this joke.
Please be careful to whom you say, “Be yourself.” It’s not for everybody.
The sign on the neighbor’s lawn said, “Caution: These premises are alarmed!”
Just how scary ARE these people?
Those are my principles, and if you don’t like them…well, I have others.
We’re going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there’s no pop
You’re the best father I can imagine, unless you lost my inheritance in the
economic meltdown in which case I can imagine better.
Dr Bob Griffin
“Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!”