[‘Tis the Season for all things football, so I thought the repeat of an old
Grif.Net blog from 15+ years ago seemed appropriate. Defining Church
activity in football terms:]
Quarterback Sneak – Church members quietly leaving during the final song.
Draw Play – What many children do with the bulletin during worship.
Halftime – The period between Sunday School and worship when many choose to
leave.
Benchwarmer – Those who do not sing, pray, work, or apparently do anything
except sit.
Backfield-in-Motion – Making a trip to the back of the room (to the restroom
or coffee) during the service.
Staying in the Pocket – What happens to a lot of money that should be given
to the Lord’s work.
Two-minute Warning – The point at which you realize the sermon is almost
over and begin to gather up your children and belongings.
Instant Replay – The preacher loses his notes and falls back on last week’s
illustrations.
Sudden Death – What happens to the attention span of the congregation if the
preacher goes “overtime”.
Trap – You’re called on to pray and have been dozing.
End Run – Getting out of church quickly, without speaking to any guest or
fellow member.
Flex Defense – The ability to allow absolutely nothing said during the
sermon to affect your life.
Halfback Option – The decision of 50% of the congregation not to return for
the next service.
Blitz – The rush to Perkins or Golden Corral following the closing prayer.
~~
Dr Bob Griffin
[email protected] www.grif.net
“Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!”