[These are all “mine”, as in I stole them from so many sources I can’t
remember which from whom. So please give credit to, ah, er, um, well . . ]
“I cook using the four basic food groups – canned, boxed, bagged and
frozen.”
“A balanced diet is having a cookie in each hand.”
“When I read about the evils of drinking alcohol, I immediately gave up
reading.”
“If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, talks like a duck, it probably
needs a little more time in the microwave.”
“If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and making love, you don’t
actually live longer; it just seems longer.”
“The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later you’re
hungry again.”
“Cookie pieces contain no calories – the process of breaking causes fat
leakage.”
“If you like fast food, avoid eating escargot.”
“I cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.”
“No one ever said, “Mmmmm. Poached carrots.”
“My wife is on a tropical diet – coconuts and bananas. She hasn’t lost much
weight, but you should see her climb a tree.”
~~
Dr Bob Griffin
[email protected] www.grif.net
“Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!”