[I joked with a friend that I ushered in the New Year at 10 pm and he
forwarded this description of a senior citizen]
I am a senior citizen…
- I’m the life of the party… even when it lasts ’till 8pm.
- I’m very good at opening childproof caps with a hammer.
- I’m usually interested in going home before I get to where I’m going.
- I’m good on a trip for at least an hour without my aspirin or antacids.
- I’m the first one to find the bathroom wherever I go.
- I’m awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.
- I’m smiling all the time because I can’t hear a word you’re saying.
- I’m very good at telling stories…over and over and over and over.
- I’m aware that other people’s grandchildren are not as bright as mine.
- I’m so cared for: long-term care, eye care, private care, dental care.
- I’m not grouchy; I just don’t like traffic, waiting, children,
politicians.
- I’m positive I did housework correctly before the Internet.
- I’m sure everything I can’t find is in a secure place.
- I’m wrinkled, saggy and lumpy, and that’s just my left leg.
- I’m having trouble remembering simple words like… uh…
- I’m realizing that aging is not for sissies.
- I’m walking more (to the bathroom) and enjoying it less.
- I’m sure they are making adults much younger these days.
- I’m in the *initial* state of my golden years: SS, CD’s, IRA’s, AARP.
- I’m wondering, if you’re only as old as you feel, how could I be alive at
150?
- I’m anti-everything now: anti-fat, anti-smoke, anti-noise,
anti-inflammatory.
- I’m a walking storeroom of facts. I’ve just lost the key to the storeroom.
I’m a Senior Citizen and I think I am having the time of my life…
Aren’t I?
~~
Dr Bob Griffin
bob@grif.net www.grif.net
“Jesus Knows Me, This I Love!”
