12/18/07 Grif.Net – Politically Correct Statements

12/18/07 Grif.Net – Politically Correct Statements

[Help to parents who want to communicate with their children over the
Christmas break]

Your bedroom isn’t cluttered; it’s just “passage restrictive.”

Kids don’t get grounded anymore. They merely hit “social speed bumps.”

You’re not late; you just have a “rescheduled arrival time.”

You’re not having a bad hair day; you’re suffering from “rebellious follicle

No one’s tall anymore. He’s “vertically enhanced.”

You’re not shy. You’re “conversationally selective.”

You don’t talk a lot. You’re just “abundantly verbal.”

The food at the school cafeteria isn’t awful. It’s “digestively

No one fails a class anymore; he’s merely “passing impaired.”

You don’t have detention, you’re just one of the “exit delayed.”

These days, a student isn’t lazy. He’s “energetically declined.”

Your locker isn’t overflowing with junk; it’s just “closure prohibitive.”

Your homework isn’t missing; it’s just having an “out-of-notebook

You’re not sleeping in class; you’re “rationing consciousness.”

You’re not being sent to the principal’s office. You’re “going on a
mandatory field trip to the administrative building.”

Dr Bob Griffin,
1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given