Grif.Net

07/03/07 Grif.Net – Zen Sarcasm

07/03/07 Grif.Net – Zen Sarcasm

[Forward from Rob] “Zen Sarcasm”

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I
may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me
alone.

2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky
tire.

3. Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.

4. Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.

5. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

6. If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car
payments.

7. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That
way, when you criticize them you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.

8. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably
worth it.

9. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

10. We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our bottom .Then
things get worse.

11. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and laxative on the
same night.

12. There is a fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”

13. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a
big deal about your birthday . around age 11.

14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

15. That which does not kill me postpones the inevitable.

~~
Dr Bob Griffin, www.grif.net
1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given